 "Photo: Daniel Meza / Staff Photographer")
 "Photo: Daniel Meza / Staff Photographer")
 "Photo: Daniel Meza / Staff Photographer")
Often times in conversation about the opposite sex, the words “confused” and “frustrated” are mentioned. Since the beginning of time, men and women have been bewildered by one another and have either misunderstood what the other could be thinking or misinterpreted body language.
Though people are often baffled by some of the more subtle body cues, the human brain picks up on body language automatically on a daily basis. For example, if a person is standing with their arms crossed, it is assumed they are being reserved or closed off and are probably not open to sharing much information.
Other common clues to emotions and thoughts are when a person shifts their weight from foot to foot, which gives off a sense of wanting to be elsewhere. And when a person is avoiding eye contact, it usually means they are not being truthful.
While common body language clues are often easy to spot, it’s the lesser known body signals that could give a window into what people are really thinking and feeling. This can be a time-saver when it comes to dating and forming relationships.
“Since nonverbal communication is between 60 to 75 percent of the impact of a message, you could use the power of body language to become tremendously successful ... in your career, business, relationships, love life and anything else that involves interacting or communicating with people,” according to the Web site of Kevin Hogan a body language, persuasion and sales expert.
One interpretive signal that reveals a person may be lying is if their pupils contract or eyes flick to the side. So if someone is talking and their pupils shrink or flick, it is safe to assume what they are saying may not be the truth.
On the other hand, expansion of the pupils is said to be associated with lust, or looking at something a person finds appealing. So if a person asks someone out on a date and their pupils dilate, that might be a sign the relationship has potential while shrinking pupils should cause caution.
Lips can also give silent clues into a person’s mind. Parted lips can signal interest and flirting, while pursed lips indicate anger or disapproval with a person or something they are doing.
Most of these body signals apply to both men and women, but there are some that tend to be associated with one sex more than the other.
“Men and women behave and respond to body movements in different ways,” Hogan said. “So it’s crucial for you to suit your body language depending on the gender of the person you meet, or you could damage a relationship or business without even knowing it.”
Women often show disinterest when being hit on, yet most men fail to pick up on the clues. For example, if a woman keeps looking away or is being abrupt, it is most likely a sign she is uninterested or doesn’t want to be bothered. Men often see this evasiveness as a part of the chase, and many think that it’s just a “woman thing” to play hard to get by acting disinterested.
Also, if she is avoiding eye contact, it’s generally because she feels uncomfortable, which can be caused by the situation or the attention. In this case, if she proves unresponsive to further attempts for attention, it may be best to just accept she may not feel safe in the environment or may be uninterested in the pursuer.
As for a man, if he is focusing more on other woman, it doesn’t necessarily mean he is not interested, but rather he is not looking to commit to anything at that point. If this occurs, look at his hands. If his palms are facing upward, this can signal sincerity and a general interest. So even if his eyes wander, he may still be interested.
Then focus on his legs; if he is sitting and his ankles are crossed, he is most likely relaxed and enjoying himself. Also, if he is leaning toward the girl as they talk, he is more than likely open to get to know her and pursue some sort of relationship.
Because people often hear a person has four seconds to make a good impression, it is wise to not only read another person’s body language but also be aware of one’s own. A person never knows when a potential relationship may spark, so make sure body language best represents thinking patterns and feelings correctly, otherwise a man or woman may be put off by the signals.
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